Quote of the Week:

Me: "I don't consider hanging out in a bar a good way of finding dates."
Lindsay: "No. [A pause.] You could go through asking for the designated drivers."

***

Grocery shopping in the Toledo area will never be the same again. Bassett's Market is in town and open as of 7 AM this morning.

We were hoping to open yesterday, but that didn't happen because of technical difficulties with the register. We were all fairly unhappy with the techies who didn't make things happen.

So, this morning, there I was at 6:50 AM. Jonathan, the company's President/CEO, and I, went downstairs to open the doors. He unlocked the exterior door, and I opened the interior door. And immediately, the "exit" door, which is automatic, did not work.

Let's hope that one wasn't an omen. And we fixed it pretty quickly.

I have to tell you, it was a pretty awesome feeling putting the "NOW OPEN" magnets over the words "Opening August 27" on our new signs in the front window. I then assumed the position of greeter to the customers-slash-drill sergeant to the high schoolers who are our carryouts. Do not ask whether they want their bags carried out to the car; ask where their car is and take them out. There's no one in Lane 2, so in Lane 2, you should be. Pull more of those carts there. It's fine to stand and wait since all of the lanes are occupied by baggers, but please step forward three steps out of the flow of traffic.

I can sum up my morning's instructions in the following, oft-repeated phrase. For those of you know who the Whipmaster is (don't worry, those who don't, it's nothing nearly as fun as you think it is), it was said in a tone much like his: "Take a look at the title on your tag. Does it say BAGGER? No, it says CARRYOUT." Amazingly, one of the carryouts asked me what the difference was. I obligingly explained to him, in a tone only slightly clipped, that a bagger bags [and, I did not say, then stands by like a bump on the log while his customers struggle with their bags as they walk out the door, only maybe to return], while a carryout carries his customer's things out to their car, loading it while they get in their car and allowing them to cruise out of the parking lot with a smile on their face.

(My new motto? "We don't hire baggers at Bassett's. We hire carryouts.")

**

PS: If anyone out there knows how to make a decent looking Word document out of one's iPod playlist, could you pass that onto me?